Archive for September, 2008

Chapter 28

{ September 23, 2008 @ 10:16 pm } · { Fellowship }
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28

 

The phone rang, but Tarja didn’t pick it up. She didn’t want to talk to Marcelo. The two had barely spoken this past while, and Marcelo had only been home once since the renovations were finished. He kept making up excuses to be away, but Tarja knew that he was avoiding her, and, if she was honest with herself, she wasn’t sad about it. There was a barrier between them now that had never been there before, and Marcelo was running away from it. He would call frequently, act as though he was sorry for what he’d done, ask for forgiveness that Tarja never gave. She didn’t believe he felt remorse about telling the newspapers about Anette, because this was all a game to him. Maybe it never clicked in, or maybe he just didn’t care, that he was toying with real people. Nightwish had never been her enemy, not even after they fired her. She hadn’t spoken to them for years afterwards, but she had never hated them, and she never wanted to see them hurt, but they were now. Marcelo’s betrayal had made Tarja question his motives all through the time when he’d been with her while she was in Nightwish, until she decided that it was useless dwelling on the past.

 

Tarja had no way of knowing whether or not Emppu  had told the rest of the band that she hadn’t told the newspapers, but that Marcelo had. She hadn’t talked to any of them since that meeting with him, because she knew it was better she gave them their space. She should probably never have contacted Tuomas to begin with. How had she honestly thought things would end well? These people weren’t her friends anymore, but just people she knew who had betrayed her in her past. It was a futile endeavor on her part, trying to find forgiveness for whatever it was she had done that had gotten her fired. They had not made an attempt to apologize to her, so why did she bother? No, it was best if she just forgot about them and went about her life. Of course, that was easier said than done. In the past weeks, she had been itching to call or text Anette or Emppu. It took all her willpower, sometimes, not to do so. Sometimes her thoughts would drift back to them and she’d wonder what they were doing, if they were playing a show or at home with their families and friends. She would wonder if Emppu had told them the truth and if Tuomas had forgiven her. Every time such thoughts floated up, she would quell them immediately, not willing to go down that path again.

 

The days stretched in her empty house. Sometimes she would call friends over so she would have people to talk to, and other times she would work on new material. She couldn’t seem to find it in herself to care that Marcelo wasn’t around, but she chastised herself for that. She told herself that she should care, because he was her husband. It took a few more days of silence for her to pick up the phone and call him. Avoiding the problem would never fix it, and all she wished was the she and Marcelo could get along again like they used to, though she feared that would never be possible. After three rings, she worried that he wouldn’t pick up his cell, but right as she was about to hang up, he did.

“Hello?”

Tarja hesitated before replying. “Hello, Marcelo. It’s Tarja.”

“Oh.”

The emotion left his voice, and it hurt her.

“What do you want?” he asked.

“I just wanted to talk to you…to see when you were coming home.”

There was silence on the other end for a moment.

“I have business meetings, I don’t know when I’ll be home.”

Tarja’s heart sank, but somewhere in the back of her mind, she wondered why she suddenly cared that he wasn’t home.

“Don’t you have any idea when you’ll be back?” she questioned, trying to keep the hurt out of her voice.

“I don’t know.”

There was a long, awkward silence as Tarja fought within herself, trying to decide what she should say.

“Marcelo, I’m sorry.” She hated herself for the pleading in her voice. What was she even apologizing for? Why did she feel like she truly had something to be sorry for?

“Sorry for what?” His voice was still emotionless.

“I’m sorry…about what happened. I overreacted. I’m sorry. Please come home.” She was almost begging now.

He didn’t say anything for a little while.

“Please, Marcelo. I’m sorry. Please come back home.”

“Okay. Well, I’ll be home as soon as I can. Early next week. Thanks for calling.”

He hung up before she had a chance to say good-bye. She felt pleased that he was coming home at the same time that she was disgusted with herself. Why had she acted that way? Why had she apologized? She didn’t understand it, but decided to look past it, hoping that this whole thing was resolved and things could go back to the way they were before.

And we’re back! Chapter 27

{ September 5, 2008 @ 10:44 pm } · { Fellowship }
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27

 

Backstage before their Gothenburg gig, Marco was alone, playing his DS and reveling in the solitude.  He heard someone shuffling into the room, but didn’t bother looking up; he was at a crucial point in the game, after all. It required serious concentration and any missteps now would ruin everything he’d achieved in the past days.   Absorbed in his game, he didn’t notice that Jukka had sat down next to him until the drummer laughed.

“No, you’re going about it all wrong, you’re never going to win like that.”

Almost as soon as the words left his mouth, there was a sad little tune from the game and the words “Game Over” flashing in the screen.

“Look what you made me do!” Marco grumbled, flipping the Nintendo gaming system shut.  “Now I have to start all over again.”

Jukka patted him on the shoulder. “There, there. It’ll keep you busy. How about a beer?” He held one out to the grumpy bassist.

“Fine.” Marco pretended to be grudgingly taking the beer from Jukka’s hand, but he would never begrudge a beer, and Jukka knew it.

“There, all better now?” Jukka asked with a grin, taking a swig from his bottle.

“Oh, okay. I’ll forgive you.” Laughing a little, Marco took a sip of beer, glancing at the door to see Anette walking in, looking tense. “You okay?” he asked her, concerned.

“Fine, fine. I’m fine,” she replied, not meeting his eyes. “Just worried. I think I’m getting another cold.” She smiled weakly and gave a little laugh, but Marco wasn’t going to be fooled. With all the time they’d spent together, they all knew each other well enough to see through any façades, and Marco knew that Anette knew that. That she was pretending told him that something was troubling her more deeply than usual, and he wasn’t going to give up.

After the show, I’ll try to talk to her, he thought, deciding it would be best not to have an argument or intense discussion right before a show.

 

All five of them stood just backstage as the intro music played, the tingling excitement that always permeated the air before they went on-stage thick around them tonight. Anette’s enthusiasm was not as bright as usual, but at least it was there. There was nervous fidgeting and smiles all ‘round as they prepared themselves mentally. They always wanted to put on the best show they possibly could, never wanting to disappoint. The screaming of the fans on the floor grew louder as the “Nightwish!” chants began. They let them go on for a bit longer, and then Jukka stepped onto the stage and the screaming grew louder. Marco observed him adjusting his drums as he waited for the song to start. Tuomas went on-stage next, waving to the crowd as he walked across the stage to his keyboards. Emppu snuck onto stage and the song was started! Marco entered the stage with a silent prayer that all would go well, and it did. The way Anette so obviously relaxed as she performed was amazing, and it was so clear to him that she had been the perfect choice. He had never doubted it once since they hired her, but sometimes it was so much more obvious than others. Like tonight, and how she so obviously felt what she was singing and enjoyed being there on-stage regardless of conditions backstage or the emotional rollercoaster that had been her life these past months.

 

Leaving the stage for the last time, after the encore, all the band members seemed  to glow with happiness. The show had gone really well and no one had any complaints. Broad smiles were plastered across all their faces as they talked about it’ the crowd, the songs, the performance. It was as though a very heavy weight had been lifted from the air around them, at least for the time being, and they were all basking in their joie de vivre. The feeling wore off slightly as they tried to leave the venue an hour or so later and were bombarded by fans. Emppu, surprisingly, took the time to sign a few autographs before making a beeline to the bus, Anette not far behind. Marco, Jukka and Tuomas stayed to chat with the fans, Marco somewhat tired but always willing to take the time for the people who were supporting the band.

“Do you enjoy Sweden?” a young man asked in broken English as Marco signed his ticket stub. Grinning widely, Marco replied, “Of course! It’s a beautiful country and there’s a lot of great people here!” Hearing his words, the young man’s face completely lit up. They shook hands and the fan left as Marco turned to another person in the throng.

 

The crowd dissipated and the three band members who had been hanging out with them headed to the bus, which would bring them to the airport and on to their homes. As they stepped on, Marco saw that Anette and Emppu were watching TV in silence.

“They’re gone?”

“Yep,” said Marco, flopping into a chair. “Great show tonight, eh?”

“Definitely. You sang better than ever, Anette!” Tuomas exclaimed, reaching into the mini-fridge to get some beers. He tossed one to each of the guys and held one out as an offering to Anette, who declined.

“No thanks, I have to drive home,” she said, and Tuomas shrugged and put it back in the fridge, taking a seat for himself. “I guess I should get going, then,” Anette said into the comfortable silence that had settled over them. “It’s about a two hour drive, and I’m not a fan of driving at night.” She reached into the mini-fridge and grabbed herself a Red Bull. “Always go prepared,” she grinned, stepping out of the bus as they all said good-bye to her back, Marco realizing that he hadn’t asked her what was bothering her before the gig.

 
A/N: Apologies for the major shortness of the chapter. It’ll take a bit to get back into the swing of things, methinks.